Practice patience; it is the essence of praise.
Have patience, for that is true worship.
No other worship is worth as much.
Have patience; patience is the key to all relief.

-Rumi, “Mathnawi”

Dear Mr Who Has A Problem With Me;

It’s funny isn’t it how when you see me, or should I say the lack of me, that you seem to find the necessity to always comment.

You seem to think i’m oppressed yet the only oppression I suffer is from you.

You presume my man and my religion enforce this cloth on me, you presume covering up is a form of oppressing me. Yet you never care to ask, so that you may know the truth.
Instead you prefer to stand and insult, though your words to me are like that of a dog, which barks continuously and is easily ignored.

It is your prejudice and discrimination that oppresses me not this cloth that I choose to wear.

Let me give you a few choice examples of your oppression.
Remember that time you chose to stop me at the store and enforce your unwanted opinion on me, that were you able, you would make “the likes of me” illegal.
Remember how you backed away so easily when I warned you, if you say a word more, I would report you for verbal abuse?

So now think, verbal abuse is a crime, and the victims of crime are oppressed, so what does that make you?
Now you see, how you’re the oppressor and not this religion I choose to follow of my own free will?!

Or maybe you remember the time, when you stopped me at the give way, to once again subject me to your unwanted opinion.
At that time you once again, chose to say my attire should be banned and called me a phantom. (If I remember correctly you thought the car was driving its self).

So now you tell me, look at you and look at me.
You seem to think I’m oppressed, yet the only person oppressing me is you!

I stand by and wait for the day, that you shed your cloth of backwardness and ignorance, ‘cos if you look hard enough you can easily see, the only oppressed person here is you!

You have the problem with what I wear, not me. You’re the one who needs to resort to profanity every-time you see me.
You’re the one who thinks I’m oppressed not me.

So now its clear to see, the problem lies with you and not me, you’re own thoughts and assumptions are oppressing you, yet you choose to blame it all on me.

Kind Regards
Niqabi Hijabi

assalamualaykum warahmatuallahi wabarakatuhu

The comment left by Br Abdul jawad reminded me of something I forgot to add at the end of the last post:

Alhumdulillah, looking back now, I realise I learnt many many lessons in those few weeks.

But what kept within my heart the most, was the dua she made for me constantly as I helped her through her labour, and after care.

This made me determined to spend a life in the service of helping people anyway I could, because the heart felt dua of a person means more than any worldly gain.

Ma’assalam

Been in a rather sombre mood for the past few days, I think its all the hospital trips taking their toll on. Seems to me half the world is hospitalised!

Nearly three years ago I went through an experience, which I could truly call a lesson in life.

My neighbour, who is like a sister to me and my family, was expecting her first child (the child was almost like my own, a baby after soo long!), she was due on the 11th of April but started feeling slight pain from the 9th, when she phoned up the hospital (the crazy system of calling before going in!), they told her to wait it out until her contractions were a minute apart.

On the 11th she still hadn’t had any such thing, so she went for her 9 plus one appointment (I went with her), the guy that examined her was a student, and when he put his portable sonograph (I think thats what its called) to her stomach, he thought he couldn’t hear anything, but he said that his batteries had been playing up and went to find replacements. When he returned he still was in doubt, he asked her if her child had moved and she said the last she had felt was the night before, but she hadn’t worried because in the pregnancy guide given by the hospital it said as the child is ready to be born movement becomes less frequent.

The student then sent her for an ultrasound by the midwife, the midwife also wasn’t too happy, and at that time I was sent to call her husband.
I felt like crying but knew I had to be strong, so when I went back, on the screen you could see an ultrasound picture by now they had taken her to the main ultra sound room, and to the doctor in charge.
He waited for me to enter and said “I’m sorry, there is no heart beat, and it seems the baby has died since about a day”.
The feelings that went through me that moment, I don’t think I can ever put into words, yet what hit me the most was not my own feelings but the feelings of the mother, who had waited 9 months to hold her baby, she hadn’t had an easy pregnancy, but every time se would consolidate herself saying what was to come would make it worth it. She broke down, it took her quite some time to grasp what she was told, and even then she was still in utter shock.

The craziest part was that the doc’s made her go home instead of inducing the birth the same day, that night she went home and spent the entire night in the baby’s prepared room crying.

The next day we took her to the hospital again to deliver the baby (induced natural birth), I’ve heard people say that the pain of child birth is worth it at the end and you forget it the moment you hold the baby in your arms, but what if you know that you’re giving birth to a dead child? What then? When you know, that after this immense pain you aren’t going to have a bundle of joy to play with but a vast emptiness and broken hope?

It takes the strongest of eman to come through a situation like this, alhumdulillah she had that faith, it didn’t stop the tears or the pain, but it was a comfort knowing that her place in jannah was now secure, that each moment of pain she had patience upon was reward for her. It made me think, what of those who didn’t have eman? Those who lived for only this world? How truly blessed we are to have eman, one of the greatest gifts and the treasure of most value. Truly without it what would this life be? 

Assalmaualaykum WarahmatuAllah

I came across this today, and subhanAllah my heart cried out.

http://achelois.wordpress.com/2007/01/18/rape-in-marriage/ 
I’ve worked with women who were in these situations or have come through situations such as these, it heart wrenching.
May Allah protect all muslimeen from oppression and may He instill in us the correct a’adab and akhlaq of Islam. Ameen

WaAlaykumassalam warahmatuAllah

I’ve added more recipies, these are two ace recipes, try em if you can.

 http://seedsofrealisation.hadithuna.com/recipes-biscuitscookies/

I’m going to add some of my savoury recipes soon inshaAllah, ranging from pastas, pastries and pies to indian dishes
(any requests just ask )

Duas Requested

Ma’assalam

السَّلامْ عَلَيْكُمْ وَ رَحْمَةُ اللهِ وَ بَرَكاته

 

تَتَجَافَى جُنُوبُهُمْ عَنِ الْمَضَاجِعِ يَدْعُونَ رَبَّهُمْ خَوْفًا وَطَمَعًا وَمِمَّا رَزَقْنَاهُمْ يُنفِقُونَ

“Their limbs do forsake their beds of sleep, the while they call on their Lord, in Fear and Hope: and they spend (in charity) out of the sustenance which We have bestowed on them. ”

Surah Sajadah Ayah 16

Recently I’ve been memorising surah sajadah, and this one ayah continuously keeps running through my head.
Being someone who needs her sleep, and at times finding it extremely difficult to get up for qiyam, this ayah is a great reminder, that those who are true believers, are those who are able to forsake their warm beds for their lord and stand up in the night in order to worship and make dua to him.

Continuously having been told that the sign of the successful is that they wake for qiyaam, but in the words of Allah it is so much more beautiful!

May Allah Make us from those who can forsake our beds for Him. Ameen

Duas Requested

السَّلامْ عَلَيْكُمْ وَ رَحْمَةُ اللهِ وَ بَرَكاته

السَّلامْ عَلَيْكُمْ وَ رَحْمَةُ اللهِ وَ بَرَكاته

Apologies for not updating, my brother is in hospital, so I’m doing the daily runs to and fro. I will update as much as I can inshaAllah.

I will continue with the etiquette’s with the acquaintance at a later time inshaAllah, just wanted to write a personal post today about the kids.

Alhumdulillah we’ve finally set into a proper routine, we started learning 40 ahadeeth with meaning, along side the seerah, but cos of the bugs and stuff going around, many of them take days off, and getting them caught up is a task and a half! Today one of the 4 year old says she didnt attend madrassah yesterday because she had a “headache” … heh.

Which reminds me, the two most talkative in my class are a pair of 4 year olds, they sit and talk to each other behind their Ahsanal Qawaaids, like i don’t notice them, but honestly what do 4 year olds have so much to talk about?!

One of the girls asked me yeterday:
“Apa, If your a muslim, does it mean you can only travel to Pakistan?”
I was like “umm no, why?”
She answers “well thats the only place everyone I know goes!

To leave the best to the last:
Every so occasionally the kids want to know why I’m not married yet,  they seem to care more than I do.
Anyway, I say to them, that its not easy you can’t just marry anyone, and mentioned the five qualities that Islam mentions, that the person must be a good person and behave in an islamic way.
So one of the girls says “But Apa! They could just lie! They could just pretend to be good but not be good!”
I say “well thats where the biggest problem lies isn’t it, but we just have to trust Allah , and remember that no matter what happens its what He wanted to happen to us”
“well that’s it then, I’m not getting married”

And so agree 90% of the class!

Duas Requested

السَّلامْ عَلَيْكُمْ وَ رَحْمَةُ اللهِ وَ بَرَكاته 

Assalamualaykum

Radiant Light stole a post from Mr Espy…

On Marriage (clickety click here to be transported)

Here is an exerpt

Hadhrat Asma (may Allah be pleased with her) said to her daughter at the time of her marriage:

“You are going to spend such a life where you shall have to live long and you are going to the bed of such a person who you have no acquaintance. You are going to love one with whom you had no love before.

Make for him such a world, which will be heaven for you, prepare for him such a bed, which will be a pillar for you.

Be such a slave for him that he may become your slave.

Don’t go willingly to him, lest you become to him an object of hatred.

Don’t remain far from him, lest he may forget you. When he remains near you, be near him, when he stays distant from you save your nose, ears and eyes.

Let him not get from you except sweet smiles. Let him not hear from you except sweet words. Let him not see in you except beauty”

Ihya Uloom Din

Considering the best questions anybody ever seems to want to ask me these days are about marriage :P, thought this would be beneficial for all inshaAllah.

Also read the other posts on Mr Espy’s blog, specifically the ones relating to how fiqh ahnaaf reaches all the way back to Rasool Allah here’s the link:

Ahnaf Begininng and Ending - Clickety click here once again!

Duas Requested

Ma’assalam

السَّلامْ عَلَيْكُمْ وَ رَحْمَةُ اللهِ وَ بَرَكات

Apologies for the lack of updates, illness plus an accumulation of other responsibilities had me tied up.
Without further ado, let’s continue on to the etiquette’s with the acquaintance, I found this interesting (albeit scary at times), but still very beneficial alhumdulillah.

The Etiquette’s with the Acquaintances

Beware of your acquaintances, for you will receive only evil from those whom you do not know intimately.
Your friends will render help to you, those who are completely unknown to you will not thwart you, but all evil will come upon you through those acquaintances who only express friendship with their tongues.
So reduce the number of such acquaintances as far as possible.

When you are associated with acquaintances, in an academic institution, or big mosque, or small mosque, or town, or market, you must not despise any one of them, for you do not know, perhaps he is better than you.

Do not consider them great in their worldly condition, lest you be destroyed; because the world has little worth in the estimation of Allah , and all that is in it is also of little value; so whenever worldly men appear to be great in your mind, you fall away form the eyes of Allah .
Guard yourself against using your religion in order to achieve some of their worldly possessions. Anyone who did this became insignificant in their eyes and was deprived of their possession.

If your acquaintances are hostile to you do not face them with enmity, for you are unable to be patient when they require you; so your religious nature will disappear in their enmity towards you; thus your difficulties with them will be prolonged.
On the other hand if they respect you, praise you in your presence and express their friendship for you, do not trust them, for if you inquire into the real nature of this, you will not find even one percent of them sincere in their behaviour.

Do not expect that their behaviour will be the one and the same in public and in private. Do not be astonished if they rebuke you in your absence and do not be angry for that, because should you be fair, you would find similar behaviour in yourself even concerning your friends and relatives, and indeed concerning your teachers and parents, in their absence you will speak of things concerning them that you would not mention in their presence.

Continue soon inshaAllah 

Duas Requested
Ma’assalam