Friendship: Final Part

Posted under Friendship, Imam ghazzali, Nasiha, final part, nasihah, part 5 by Radiant Light

السَّلامْ عَلَيْكُمْ وَ رَحْمَةُ اللهِ وَ بَرَكات

To Conclude:

The Duties of Friendship Are:

1. To help the friend financially even when one needs money for oneself. If this is not possible, one should help the friend with one’s surplus wealth at the time of his need. One should also assist him in his needs spontaneously, before he seeks assistance.

2. To hide his secrets, and to conceal his faults.

3. Not to convey to him others’ disdain for him thereby making him unhappy. Rather convey to him others’ praises of him, thereby pleasing him.

4. To listen to him with full attention when he speaks and not to argue with him.

5. To call him with the name which he likes the most, to praise him by mentioning his deeds that one knows, and to express gratitude to him in his presence for the good deeds that he has done.

6. To defend the friend in his absence when aspersions are cast on his good repute, as one defends oneself.

7. To admonish him with kindness and in ambiguous terms when he needs admonition.

8. To forgive his faults and errors and not to blame him.

9. In one’s solitude, to pray for the friend during his lifetime and also after his death.

10. To take care of a friend’s wife and his other relatives after his death.

11. To choose to make things easy for the friend; so one will not charge him with the meeting of any of one’s needs.

12. To give rest to his mind by removing causes of distress.

13. To express joy at all his delights, and to express sorrow at all unwanted things which happen to him, and to keep in mind that feeling for him which has been expressed to him so that one becomes truthful in ones friendships, both secretly and openly.

14. To greet the friend first when he approaches, to make room for him, to come out from the house to receive him, to see him off when he leaves, to keep silent when he speaks until he completes his conversation, and not to interrupt him when speaking.

In short: One is to behave with one’s friend just as one would like him to behave with you.
The brotherhood (Friendship) of a man who does not want for his brother what he wants for himself is hypocrisy (Nifaq) and is an evil for him in this world and the hereafter.

Next  up : The etiquette’s with the acquaintances.

 Apologies for the delay in posting and replying to comments (via email), my email’s been acting funny and not letting me send mail.
Also got a new comp (finally!!) its been acting up on me when installing programmes and things, I will inshaAllah once I get all set up start up class’ of one class a week on topic decided by the students :) more info Vista-permitting!

Duas Requested.

  السَّلامْ عَلَيْكُمْ وَ رَحْمَةُ اللهِ وَ بَرَكات